Friday, June 26, 2009

The icons have fallen

Mike Jackson was messed up, we all know it, but it's hard to make lemonade out of sewage. He had a raw deal with his dad being an abusive dick who put his kids to work at ridiculously young ages and Mike, being the only one with talent, bore the brunt of the workload. In interviews I heard today I've heard more than one person say nobody has ever worked harder in fact. He really didn't get to live until he was insanely famous and rich and could do whatever he wanted, there was nobody telling him no. It went WAY too far, how far we'll probably never know, but let's shine a light on why he was a big deal for all the folk born before 1975ish like me.
-750 million albums sold worldwide
- Thriller- the highest selling album of all-time
-13 Grammy's and 13 #1 singles
- 6 #1 singles on the same album (Bad)
- Estimated $500 million made singing.
Arguably the best entertainer/dancer of all-time. Thriller netted him around $112 million dollars estimated. He owned half of SONY ATV, which means he had musical rights to the Beatles and 300,000 other songs estimated to be worth a few billion dollars.
He dominated the 80's unlike any other artist/entertainer dominated an era. The man is still and icon that has a family, so try to be somewhat respectful for what he accomplished and not for what he's become known for.

Farrah on the other hand was simply a blindingly gorgeous woman with a haircut that carried her namesake. Farrah certainly wasn't part of the spotlight later in life, but had a dominant stretch of fame and fortune. It's been a rough week and it Swayze kicks the can soon it'll be even more rough.

NBA draft just happened and I watched some of it before falling asleep. Seems to me there's still a strange fixation on foreign players that are not planning on playing in the NBA for at least another year. Having players "develop" in Europe is just dumb. I'm sure some Euro leagues are good, but it seems the odds on favorite is that they'll play lackluster competition and waste a year away from playing in the NBA.

There's also a dizzying amount of trades I don't really get, but it keeps things interesting. The Timberwolves drafting 3 point gaurds in the first round only to deal Lawson for sure, and probably Rubio later seems a bit strange. I don't think next years draft is going to have overwhelming value, so why not just try to rebuild a year early from this year's solid crop? I like GM's in basketball and their willingness to move big names like Vinsanity and Shaq on a whim. It makes me more interested in the NBA to see how these storylines play out.

Dajuan Blair fell too far I thought, but Tractor Trailer lingers in my mind, so I understand that one. Patrick Mills shouldn't have been drafted so late and I imagine the Bucks will come to regret drafting Jodie Meeks before him. Brandon Jennings goes to the Bucks, and since we can't develop talent he'll certainly become confused with his role and fail. I'm not going to go through the teams, but kudo's to the Pacers for drafting Ty Hansborough and AJ Price, hopefully drafting players who stick around, though Price not by choice, will be rewarded with two very solid NBA players ready to contribute immediately to a rising young team.

NHL draft happened and nobody knows or cares.

I'll be trying to catch some movies soon like Transformers for sure, so I'll give you the lowdown as soon as I get on that.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Father's Day

I really can't put into words how amazing my dad really is. I can only try to make every day of his life like father's day.

You don't really understand what you have until it's gone sometimes, and I'm talking about family if you're curious at all. I've had the horrible/ life alteringn situation having a parent die WAY before the natural time as dictated by our USA census. My mother tragically left us way too soon in January of 2005. I was only 19 years old and as I realize now more than ever didn't know shit about real life. There was one beacon of strength and hope during the toughest time imaginable, and that was my dad.

My dad has had his share of incredibly rough times. By the time he turned 12 he was the oldest of 7 without a father of his own. He certainly had a hand in raising the other kids, but also managed to graduate from UW and start his own life with my mom. During the time which had to have been hardest on him, having the person he committed his life to die before her time, he stood the tallest. Somehow he comforted the rest of us and never showed how much that loss had to effect him. Anyone at the funeral or wake knows what I'm talking about. It's too bad it had to take something like that for me to realize how great I had it. Through bad times as well as good times there has been a few constants, and one of them is the simple greatness of my dad.

I can't relate to people who haven't had such a great influence in their life, I only know how to be as grateful and thankful as possible to have mine. On this special day, just realize if you're in the same boat as I am how great you have it. You may fail to come up with words to express it, as I do, but just let you're dad know how special he is and how much you love him. They've kept your house functioning as well as your life, but all they want is to know that you realize this much. A simple thanks and your attempt to explain how much they mean will be more important to them than the new driver, or whatever gift you may have gotten. I really only hope you can understand what I speak of, because I know how much it means to me to have such an amazing dad that our language fails to express the meaning of the relationship we have and what it means to me.

Please realize that though Father's Day is merely one day out of the year, your dad has been on call for the last however many days you've been alive.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Done with Brett Hating

After watching Joe Buck's new show on HBO, which Artie Lange officially destroyed like SteveO to Adam Carolla, I noticed that I'm not mad at Brett Favre. In standard Brett Favre fashion he calmly answered all questions and handled himself with class and the typical non-shalance that we've endeared too after his 16 years of service.

Brett said it best when he stated that we can't take away his 16 years in Green Bay, that's some of our friends and families lifetimes, that he our hero. He played with a myraid of injuries that probably still linger to this day. Dislocated finger? People can't stand with dislocated fingers, nevertheless have it thrown back in and run back for the next play. I don't think it's possible to find another player that played harder. He reached that eschelon of greatness where you don't doubt him, ever. Sure he'll throw a few interceptions that seem like he was ripping chrystal meth all night before the game, but it certainly wasn't because of a lack of effort. Bottom line is he wants to play and if his arm heals we'll see him in purple, and a small part of me will probably die, but it's only because the Packers told him to go pound sand. Hard to be angry at your best employee after the boss tells him he isn't welcome back to do his job.

This brings me to Artie Lange. We get it, you don't care. Not about your life, not about people you consider your friends, and certainly not for the general public. Poor Joe Buck is struggling not to cry as you throw f-bombs at him like you're Christian Bale and your director is just waving his penis at you behind your co-star during a shot. I considered a few things Artie Lange contributed to be funny, but not because the word fuck, but because when he isn't either destroyed by illegal substance, or just angry, he can genuinely be funny. It was like watching him on Conan O'Brien, only substract the fact that NBC can censor him. On HBO he was a kid in a candy store, and I can only hope Joe Buck's kids weren't watching their dad trying to improve himself and his wallet on his new venture. Artie: Maybe you should just take it easy so we don't have to place Joe Buck on suicide watch, he seems like a nice guy. You couldn't have been a bigger asshole.

Latest Brewer failure DAVE BUSH. He's been up and down earlier last year, but really seemed to find his consistency. Now he gets shelled for 7 runs in 3 2/3 and after Parra's collapse we're running out of guys to put on the mound and limp through 5 innings. I think I'm going to go sacrifice a goat or something to try to fix the bad juju. Editor's note: Don't have to sacrifice a goat as Prince hits a GRANNY in the 8th, NICE.

He's not that into= I'm not that into this movie. Adult relationships and struggles because nobody's relationship fits into the standard cookie-cutter dream relationship? NO WAY. Thank God it's loaded with stars because romantic comedy requires such keen acting ability. On the plus side Jennifer Anniston seemed to suck less than usual. Scarlett Johansen acts whorish, which is outstanding, but there isn't much else to brag about. It's pretty basic and IMDB's rating of 6.5 is about right. You can watch it and be mildly entertained, but you can find better.

Kobe won the title and should've immediately handed Pau Gasol the MVP trophy. Kobe had some excellent #'s but managed to lead his team in turnovers and finish 6th in FG %. I hate Kobe so I'm biased, but nobody can deny that Gasol is the biggest reason LA won. He defended Howard while still being a crucial cog in the offense, that's just monumental effort from a guy blasted for being soft last year. Now all I can complain about is how little he showers because his game is rock solid. The Magic did piss some games away, but having Lamar Odom and Derek Fisher as 4th and 5th scoring options is a luxury that the Magic just couldn't deal with. Kobe's not Jordan and now I'm done with it until provoked. Anyone who claims he is clearly needs to watch more film of Jordan. Luckily he won't win another title, so I probably won't have to worry about it.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

The Present

I just came from being the last-minute sub-date on a fun wedding, and I'm totally cool with that. Weddings rock the boat and I'm pleased I was a part of one that had open bar for awhile, now all I have to do is find a way back to Lake Windsor Country Club, thanks Andy.

SO... I loved being a last minute sub, I had a great time. I hung out with a gaggle of people I didn't expect and had a great free meal. DO NOT DENY A WEDDING EVER, I had a phenomenal time and best of luck Emily and Matt.

Let's get down to business. Kobe is outrageuously overrated as Derek Fisher and Pau Gasol carried him over the top while Kobe shot 5-14 with 4 turnovers. This is the first final where the star player gave up on playing basketball and his team somehow found a way to win. I fucking hate Kobe running into Dwight Howard and Hedo and drawing fouls despite the fact he elbowed Jameer Nelson in the face and conveniently didn't get whistled. Officiating basketball is outrageously difficult, but watching him hit Jameer Nelson in the face and nothing being called was just TERRIBLE.

Kobe is SO FAR from Jordan it makes me cry. He is surrounded by talent that allows Lamer Odom to be a 6th man despite that he was a former all-star. Weird that Derek Fisher didn't stay within his 9 PPG and no other game stats and transformed into BIG SHOT BOB when things were on the line. Please take note when KOBE, "THE CLOSER" had a chance to handle shit he failed miserably and let Lamer, Gasol, and Fisher handle his job while he couldn't hit a shot like Greg Norman in a clutch situation.

Trevor Ariza and Pau Gasol are the real reason for the Lakers success. Ariza was acquired in a steal from Orlando, ironic isn't it? Gasol was stolen from the Grizzlies as the perfect post player for Tex's Triangle Offense. Gasol handles everything in that offense because he can do everything, unlike D-Howard's one-dribble and a laser hook. Ariza is guarding players making 8 million a year more than him and hitting 45% of triples. He is the reason the Laker's aren't crying down 3-1 and it secretly kills me Kobe is going to be finals MVP because he's failed at all critical junctures to lead the Laker's to a Finals Win, but has had no trouble winning those games still.

FUCK KOBE AND THE RAPE HAPPY HORSE HE RODE IN ON. WAIT UNTIL KOBE ISN'T SURROUNDED BY ALL THIS TALENT BECAUSE HE'S FUCKING DONE AFTER THAT. PRETTY SWEET PLAYING WITH GREAT PLAYERS ALL FUCKING DAY. This ring will be his ring without Shaq, but it's realistically Gasol's team in the Finals. He has to hold down Dwight Howard while still producing on offense. Bynum is only good for 10 minutes and six fouls, so after that happens it's up to Gasol occasionally spelled by Odom to conquer the Herculian Beast who looks like he should've starred in 300. Why can't Kobe play on the Bucks and just epicly fail like he deserves?

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Adventureland

I caught Adventureland as a matinee and pay attention kids because it'll be on DVD soon. VERY good date/ romantic comedy/ slice of life film. They clearly didn't spend a lot of money on the thing, but they didn't need too. They have a good film that isn't life altering or too special, but worth seeing.

They have an excellent cast of up-and-comers, but also SNL stand-out Kristen Wiig, Bill Hader, and Ryan Reynolds. It has Kristen Stewart, who I fail to see the attraction or talent in. You'll notice some of the other people, most notably the guy who grew the beard for the length of "Knocked Up" (Martin Starr). That helps out with the movie that has a solid story and is kind of funny and entertaining. It was like a less funny, more serious version of that 70's show if they all worked at a theme park.

Bottom Line: Great date film, catch it on a movie channel in 4 months if nothing else.
7.3 out of 10. Kind of conflicted with giving it a digit rating.

Unrelated note: Nicholas Cage is complete garbage. He was outrageously lucky to be involved in The Rock and Con-Air. I am constantly astounded that he finds work, like Ghost Rider. How the fuck do you cast Nicholas Cage as a bad-ass hero? He's a candy-ass no talent fuck clown. Let him be roles as an alcoholic failure/ loser where he flurishes because it doesn't require him to "act", but just to be. I'm definitely boycotting any film that stupid fuck is in. I've hated him for years, even in The Rock, and everyone is slowly jumping on the fuck Nic Cage bandwagon. Jump on, there's plenty of room.

Dwight Howard is some kind of freak. He has 11 boards, 3 blocks, 1 point in the first quarter. I've seen him take 2 rebounds from fellow all-star Pau Gasol like he's a high school playing in the 5th grade game. If he can learn some kind of post moves so if he posts up it's not a dribble and a lazer hook he'll be just unstoppable. He has a ton of years in front of him because he doesn't do anything like party, just read the bible and workout. His clean living will mean he'll play until he's at least 38 at a probably very high level.

Sunday, June 7, 2009

The Hangover

The movie The Hangover is just outstanding and hilarious. It's one of the few comedies that I'm VERY happy I saw in a theater rather than waiting for it on DVD. It's one of the few comedies where the side characters are all funny. I really don't think I went more than 5 minutes without viewing something I thought was funny.

All the actors in it play up their characters very well. Zach Galifinakis (Or however you spell it) is just outstanding. I've always found him hilarious, his stand-up while he plays piano is just amazing. His character is the bride's brother who is thrown in with the groom's other friends for a complete shit-show in Vegas. The movie I find really funny because you can definitely relate to trying to piece together a night after tenaciously drinking yourself into a near coma. Galifinakis just kills it the entire movie. He goes to all lengths for his craft, which brings me to my next paragraph.

The only downfall is the amount of man-bits shown on camera. It's often funny, but it's still a little bit out of hand. Forgetting Sarah Marshall set a miserable standard of male nudity in movies. I've never denied that it's often hilarious, but looking at dicks is not too great in my book. I believe this is the first film that had more dong in it than boobs that I've ever seen. NOTE: Leave posts on this one to yourselves.

Bottom Line 9.5 out of 10. Legitimately one of the funniest films that I've ever witnessed.

Side Notes: I'm pretty excited for John Gruden to be on MNF. He's brutally honest and a football genius. Bottom Line: He's already 20 times better than Kornheiser or Theismann.

Tony Romo was golfing in my hometown this weekend. SP rocks.

Even if Kobe wins he's not close to the same caliber as Jordan. Hopefully he doesn't because watching him fail brings me joy, I apologize in advance for this. I can't explain my hatred for Kobe other than I always thought he was a selfish douchy prick when he first entered the league, then the whole rape thing ruined him in my eyes. He seems like a better person, but I don't forget things like that. He better do more charity work than Chris Paul and Warrick Dunn combined to get off my shit-list.

Just bought my first digital camera, I'm pretty pumped.