It's honestly random things I experience and feel like writing about for the entertainment of my friends and others. If you don't agree with me I really don't care, so please don't try to piss and moan about my pissing and moaning.
Monday, October 20, 2014
Fury: 5 Rambo's stuck in a TANK
I apparently missed the boat on getting a boner over this one because Fury is still tracking very well on Rotten Tomatoes. The story follows a WWII tank crew, which they lie to you and pretend that being part of a tank crew was equivalent to running around with no gun during the seige or Stalingrad. Tank crews certainly experienced death, as did all parties associated with WWII, but they were far from "out-gunned" by Germany. German tanks weren't individually superior to U.S. tanks, they were just much smarter with tactics than every other country. The movie already pissed me off and that was before seeing Shia Lebeouf, so I knew that was a bad sign. The film goes through a skirmish to show off the skills of "Fury", the tank Pitt, Shia, Michael Pena (token minority), Jon Bernthal (Shane from Walking Dead), and Logan Lerman (Excellent, especially in Perks of Being a Wallflower). Lerman is the new guy, who replaces the first person lost to the "Fury" crew. The movie follows them on a few missions, shows their comraderie and interesting relationships. It's tolerable, though generally unbelievable, like the rest of the movie to follow. SPOILER ALERT TO FOLLOW: The "powers that be" decide that, despite having an enormous force pressing onward towards Germany, they are going to send 3 tanks to defend the medical tents, supply chain, and exposed rear of the entire Army. They engage in a tank fight and lose the other two tanks, leaving just Fury and 5 dudes between a German SS unit and the rear of the line. Their tank hits a mine, the tread falls off, they are immobile. The new guy goes on patrol and find 200-300 SS soldiers marching towards them. They decide, after much drama and intensity, that they are all staying and fighting. The SS is the German elite soldiers, but in this it's like Rambo fighting the Viet Cong. They are too stupid to use guns, or aim accurately, or fire one of the 50 anti-tank RPG's they show them carrying. Meanwhile our American boys kill everything in sight and heroically defend their tank, until they start getting picked off one-by-one. This should happen within 3 minutes, but this takes 30 or so.
Bottom Line: 6.3 out of 10. Overhyped and gets into ridiculous mode way too often for me. I was never touched by their "brotherhood" and I couldn't get past the ridiculousness of a tank being completely surrounded by German soldiers who are too stupid to do anything except get shot running around near the tank. See it when it's free, but I wouldn't pay money to watch this thing.
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